"I'm offended."

We don't have to offend, but we do have a right to. Just as others have a right to judge us for giving offence.

But being offended is not an argument. Being offended, as Stephen Fry says, is nothing more than a whine. 

Self-esteem, sensitivity, respect for others’ beliefs, renunciation of prejudice are all good as far as they go [says the author of The Kindly Inquisitors, Jonathan Rauch]. But as primary social goals they are incompatible with the peaceful and productive advancement of human knowledge. To advance knowledge, we must all sometimes suffer. Worse than that, we must inflict suffering on others.

But the suffering is not literal. Sticks and stones can break your bones, but mere words cannot. 

If your opinion is honestly held, and reasonably delivered, then the best response to people who do accuse you of giving offence is “Suck it up; you’ll live.”

Robust argument is good. But simply stating "I'm offended" is not an argument. Fry and his friends Christoper Hitchens and Salman Rushdie delivered three well-known responses you should memorise for when you need them:

Hitchens:

“If someone tells me that I’ve hurt their feelings, I say, ‘I’m still waiting to hear what your point is.’
    In this country, I’ve been told, ‘That’s offensive’ as if those two words constitute an argument or a comment. Not to me they don’t.
    And I’m not running for anything, so I don’t have to pretend to like people when I don’t.”

Stephen Fry:

“It’s now very common to hear people say, ‘I’m rather offended by that.’ As if that gives them certain rights. It’s actually nothing more. . . than a whine. ‘I find that offensive.’ It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. ‘I am offended by that.’ Well, so fucking what.”

And where would Blackadder be without offence?

Salman Rushdie:

“Nobody has the right to not be offended. That right doesn’t exist in any declaration I have ever read.
    If you are offended it is your problem, and frankly lots of things offend lots of people.
    I can walk into a bookshop and point out a number of books that I find very unattractive in what they say. But it doesn’t occur to me to burn the bookshop down. If you don’t like a book, read another book. If you start reading a book and you decide you don’t like it, nobody is telling you to finish it.
    To read a 600-page novel and then say that it has deeply offended you: well, you have done a lot of work to be offended.”

[Hat tip Jerry Coyne]

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