Friday, 28 August 2009

Top Ten Things About Being Prime Minister, by John Key (aged 13¾)

I see John Boy Walton Key is appearing on Letterman in the ‘Top Ten’ slot.  So here’s some suggestions from Russell W for what he can say: The Top Ten Things About Being Prime Minister, by John Boy Key (aged 13¾)

No 10. I’m on TV!
No 9. Nick Smith & Tony Ryall are so annoying, they make me look good.
No 8. Listening?  What’s that you say?
No 7. I can say, “I’ll give you a tax cut,” even though I knew I wasn’t going to.
No 6. I get to meet the Obamessiah.
No 5. I get to overrule Bill.  Sometimes.
No 4. People think I’m nice.
No 3. I can finally say “Some of my best friends are Maori.”
No 2. I’ve discovered that flip flops are actually political principles./
And finally,
No 1. To get elected, you just have to tell people you’re different from the other team -- but you don’t have to be different.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Elijah Lineberry said...

Number 11. I get to meet long lost relatives when I am travelling abroad.

Number 12. I can provide funding for research into cloning ..(so my clone can do prison time for fraud and money laundering for John Elliott, whilst I carry on with my duties as Prime Minister)

Number 13. A nice Policeman drives me everywhere.

Number 14. "I can see Russia - errr - I mean Rangitoto, from my house!"

28 Aug 2009, 11:18:00  
Blogger OECD rank 22 kiwi said...

Burn!!

28 Aug 2009, 11:59:00  
Anonymous gregster said...

Key's a cock, and he's noticeably dissembling already.

That'll teach him for his arrogance, using this country as his plaything, as his childhood wish is amounting to.

28 Aug 2009, 13:53:00  
Blogger Ayrdale said...

Gregster, if Key's a cock, what does that make Helen ?

28 Aug 2009, 14:14:00  
Anonymous Craig said...

You guys should write for 'The Standard'.

28 Aug 2009, 15:10:00  
Blogger PC said...

You got a contract and a cheque?

28 Aug 2009, 15:19:00  
Blogger PC said...

A large one? ;^)

28 Aug 2009, 15:19:00  
Anonymous LGM said...

Flip flops. Yez. that's got him summed up nicely.

LGM

29 Aug 2009, 05:42:00  
Anonymous LGM said...

Ayrdale

Noooooooo! That's too much!

LGM

29 Aug 2009, 05:43:00  

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