Friday, August 28, 2009

Top Ten Things About Being Prime Minister, by John Key (aged 13¾)

I see John Boy Walton Key is appearing on Letterman in the ‘Top Ten’ slot.  So here’s some suggestions from Russell W for what he can say: The Top Ten Things About Being Prime Minister, by John Boy Key (aged 13¾)

No 10. I’m on TV!
No 9. Nick Smith & Tony Ryall are so annoying, they make me look good.
No 8. Listening?  What’s that you say?
No 7. I can say, “I’ll give you a tax cut,” even though I knew I wasn’t going to.
No 6. I get to meet the Obamessiah.
No 5. I get to overrule Bill.  Sometimes.
No 4. People think I’m nice.
No 3. I can finally say “Some of my best friends are Maori.”
No 2. I’ve discovered that flip flops are actually political principles./
And finally,
No 1. To get elected, you just have to tell people you’re different from the other team -- but you don’t have to be different.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Elijah Lineberry said...

Number 11. I get to meet long lost relatives when I am travelling abroad.

Number 12. I can provide funding for research into cloning ..(so my clone can do prison time for fraud and money laundering for John Elliott, whilst I carry on with my duties as Prime Minister)

Number 13. A nice Policeman drives me everywhere.

Number 14. "I can see Russia - errr - I mean Rangitoto, from my house!"

8/28/2009 11:18:00 am  
Blogger OECD rank 22 kiwi said...

Burn!!

8/28/2009 11:59:00 am  
Anonymous gregster said...

Key's a cock, and he's noticeably dissembling already.

That'll teach him for his arrogance, using this country as his plaything, as his childhood wish is amounting to.

8/28/2009 01:53:00 pm  
Blogger Ayrdale said...

Gregster, if Key's a cock, what does that make Helen ?

8/28/2009 02:14:00 pm  
Anonymous Craig said...

You guys should write for 'The Standard'.

8/28/2009 03:10:00 pm  
Blogger PC said...

You got a contract and a cheque?

8/28/2009 03:19:00 pm  
Blogger PC said...

A large one? ;^)

8/28/2009 03:19:00 pm  
Anonymous LGM said...

Flip flops. Yez. that's got him summed up nicely.

LGM

8/29/2009 05:42:00 am  
Anonymous LGM said...

Ayrdale

Noooooooo! That's too much!

LGM

8/29/2009 05:43:00 am  

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