Should you be lost in the forest, here's what you do:
"You do not panic. You do not walk aimlessly. You find a shady spot with a fine view, you sit down, you take out the cocktail shaker, the gin, the vermouth, and the olives from your back pack (which every sophisticated trekker carries) and mix yourself a martini. If there is a glacier somewhere nearby you chip off some ice to chill everything down.By the way, our story-teller got it very wrong -- he should have been carrying vodka, not gin. ;^)
You will not be lost for long. Within a few minutes someone will come from nowhere, tap your arm and say, excuse me, you are not doing that right -- that is not the way to make a proper martini."
RELATED: Beer & Elsewhere, Humour, Books