Friday, 15 August 2014

DotCon Drivel

Guest post from our accidental Invercargill correspondent, Jim Cuttance, who inadvertently stumbled into an InternetMana revival meeting….

The principle message from the savvy new internet party that's going to change everything is: don't change anything.

That's what Auckland school teacher and list no. 3 Miriam Pierard insisted at the InternetMana party's Invercargill show this week.

She assured everybody that education in New Zealand was bureaucratic perfection and new-fangled charter schools would ruin things for young people.

Because, you know, overseas evidence and stuff.

Everybody should know by now that the education department always gets everything right and if they know it don't you should send them to remedial education camps and we've got the tax drones right where we want them, thank you.

Furthermore, only a vote for the savvy new Dotcon party that's going to change everything can make sure education won't change.

Pierard and teacher-cum-lawyer Angela Greensill are driven by the desperate need for more teachers, lawyers and unionists on New Zealand's political left. Because they're just aren’t enough already.

They set the platform for megalog-on jillionaire Kim Dotcom to decry New Zealand's slow internet.

He said it was caused by Telecom's undersea cable monopoly but A-lister and unionist Laila Harre wasn't there to explain why monopolies are bad.

And party no.1 Hone Harawira wasn't there to tell us whether he is still a global warming sceptic.

However, Pierard assured us changing climate is a key youth issue, and the savvy new Dotcom party that's going to change everything is going to stop the climate from changing too.

Huzzah!

Plus, I think she's going to feed the kids.

All of them.

Because she's sick of kids dropping dead of starvation in the middle of her climate classes.

I forget why parents have some other priority rather than feeding their kids, but they do, and that’s fair, and it’s not right to ask. And anyway, it's the government's fault and stuff.

OK, I admit I was switching off quite a bit, but if you take anything away from this you know there is a savvy new Dotcom party that's going to change everything.

Or not.

2 comments:

  1. LOL. She was a social studies teacher at St Cuthbert's. It must have killed her to have to sacrifice her time and wisdom on a bunch of private school princesses.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I must have been sitting next to you. Were you that guy hiding from the cameras and pulling your beanie down over your eyes? In my eyes Kim Dotcom was the most professional speaker, while the Internet candidates were fervant amateurs and the Mana speakers were very caring with much Mana. My eyes were on the security man hiding behind the banners up front. Do we need change? Bloody Oath! Add Nicky Hager to the roadshow!

    ReplyDelete

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