I’m beginning to think the Royal Family may have some value after all.
Two recent incidents, relating to two damned big issues, have changed my mind.
It was reported yesterday by Radio NZ1 that Prince William expressed surprise when visiting Christchurch that the rebuilding in Christchurch is taking so long.
Translated from diplomatic Royal-speak, which never ever even implies fault or wrongdoing, you might read that as asking, “What the fuck have you been doing all this time, and how come it’s taking so freaking long.” Which is a fair question, Your Eminence – the correct answer to which, (should the rhetorical question have been directed at the Grey Ones as we suppose it must have been), must surely be, “Sorry, sir, we’ve been getting in everyone’s fucking way!” As they have been.
Score One to the Royals.
And the other incident, you ask?
That came about a few months after the arse fell out of the global economy, when William’s grandmother was visiting the London School of Economics. Having been shown all over the delightful facilities in which high-level econometrics and mainstream economics has been taught to hundreds of intelligent youngsters every year – not to mention the high-powered research pumped out by tenured professors therein – the Queen asked her hosts the obvious question (and here I paraphrase, using words and emotions that must surely been in her mind, if not yours and mine): “How come with all this fancy-arsed economic learning around you, you didn’t even see the fucking crash coming?” (That she refrained from shouting when she asked the question is a tribute indeed to the sort of Royal diplomacy used in delivering William’s question so blandly.)
To the Queen’s question, the response was muddled, mixed and frankly bollocks, a much-delayed three-page missive, finally blaming "a failure of the collective imagination of many bright people." Which, translated into common parlance, might almost be taken as an open admission that their fancy high-flown economic theories and models of central planning are a total disaster area.
And much the same response could, and should, have been made to William.
The Royal Family. Mostly, like Charles, they’re just fools. But sometimes, they’re like the fool in Shakespeare’s play, stating the bleeding obvious while all around are drinking up large when they should really be drinking the hemlock and falling upon their bloody swords.
God Save the Queen’s.
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1. Reported in the first story 5:30pm RNZ news last night. Surprisingly, or not, the comments had changed by the 6pm report.