After seeing John Key hand wringing all over the TV channels about his "mistake," I can see John Clarke and Brian Dawe making a meal of it all.
BRIAN DAWE: Good evening Mr Key.
JOHN KEY: Good evening, Brian.
DAWE: Don't you think it was wrong to lie to TVNZ reporter Fran Mold about your Tranz Rail shares.
KEY: No Brian, I didn't lie, it was a mistake.
DAWE: But surely ...
KEY: Yes, it was a mistake. She caught me unprepared. I was out campaigning, and what she wanted was details. Details! Just imagine! Anyway, I made a mistake.
DAWE: A mistake?
KEY: Yes, I should have told the public earlier about the full extent of my shareholding, and I should never have held the stock for as long as I did. That was another mistake.
DAWE: A mistake?
KEY: Yes, a bad mistake. Damn thing lost me money.
DAWE: But you lied about the number of shares.
KEY: No Brian, that was a mistake.
DAWE: A mistake?
KEY: Yes, it was a mistake to lie.
DAWE: Thank you, Mr Key.
KEY: Thank you, Brian.
1 comment:
Brilliant!
I thought to apply a little of this to the Karl Popper feller and his musings.
SCI: Hello Karl
KARL: Before I say hello to you I need you to develop a theory of my existence, a theory for the existence of telecommunications and a theory for the existence of everything else in the room with me as I speak and also a theory of the existence of everything which we may speak of during our up-coming telephone coversation. Then I need to develop a theory of saying "hello". I need a theory of you and also anyone else of whom we may speak or not as the case may be- just in case we do. I need a theory of the room you presently occupy. Strictly speaking I needed all this theory before I called you.
SCI: No. No need. You already exist, as does everything else you've perceived over there.
KARL: But I can't listen to you or hold this phone or be in this room unless there is theory for it. I must have theory quickly as all these observations are crowding on me so fast and I have not had the time to theorise about any of them yet. I'm supposed to build theories for all of it, before calling you, but to tell the truth I'm getting a little behind, what with reality being so damn large and all this stuff just happening all the time faster and faster and faster; faster then I can think about it all. I'm supposed to have it all theorised first, before anything happens and before I perceive any of it.
SCI: But why?
KARL: Because that's the theory.
SCI: What is?
KARL: That all perceptions are according to theory.
SCI: That's the theory?
KARL: Yes. Perceptions presuppose theory.
SCI: Then you should already have theories about all the things you were asking about.
KARL: In theory.
SCI: Right. So perception presupposes theory?
KARL: In theory.
SCI: In that case, if your grand theory is right, then you don't need me to theorise for you. You should be full with theories for everything already.
KARL: That's fine in theory, but it doesn't work, never has really. Sounds good but it needs some work. That's why I need help.
SCI: With the theorising?
KARL: That and also a theory of theorising.
SCI: What?
KARL: Yes.
SCI. What?
KARL: Theory of theorising.
SCI: Why?
KARL: Stiop asking me about that.
SCI: Why?
KARL: Because then I'll need a theory of theorising about theories. .
SCI: Is that in theory?
KARL: No. It's necessary.
SCI: What is?
KARL: The theory that comes before the theory. It has to start.
SCI: What does.
KARL: Theory.
SCI: Theory?
KARL: It's damn dangerous. If I perceive myself or anyone theorising about the theories I theorise, then I need a theory about theorising before I perceive the theorising or anyone else theorising for that matter.
SCI: Why not start with experience of reality? Your knowledge begins with your senses. You know, perception of reality via the senses. Then build your knowledge further up from there?
KARL: Because that's not the theory.
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