Dripping wet

There comes a time in every dinner party when someone will say something so dripping wet that embarrassing silence is the only polite response. Unfortunately, this morning over breakfast, I read the wettest line I'm likely to hear this weekend in National's glossy, new, full-colour environmental brochure, after which it very nearly had my breakfast over it.

"We did not inherit the land from our ancestors," the brochure informed me, "we have borrowed it from our children." Whoops, there goes my breakfast.

As dripping wet statements go, that has to be up there in the 'so-wet-as-to-be-of-tidal-wave -proportions' stakes, doesn't it? Do you have anything wetter with which you can beat that? Anything else that even a greeting card company would reject as too cringing? You know the sort of thing:

• "It takes a village to raise a child."
  
  
• " Peace on earth will come to stay, when we live Christmas every day."
  
  
• "What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and hug your family."
  
  
• "If you did not begin this day with a smile, it is not too late to start practicing for tomorrow."

Can't you just feel a whole deluge of moisture welling up?

Can you beat these? Can you come up with a real whizzer of wetness to add to these?

If you can, and if possible, try and add a rejoinder, eg., "The meek will inherit the earth, but only after the strong have raped and pillaged it." Or, "It takes a village to raise a child, but it takes a cossack to raze a village."

Have a go, ya mug.