111 can be comic

Enjoyed Te Radar's Herald column yesterday on the Foot and Mouth scare, cunningly segueing into a column on the 111 system. "It was interesting to note," he noted

that the letter that contained the threat was thoughtfully fast-posted. Clearly the perpetrator thought that the threat would be received sooner if it was posted than if it was simply phoned into the police.

It seems that what people don't realise about our 111 system is that the delays experienced by callers are in fact a deviously devised anti-terror scheme.

The theory is that anyone who rings to make a threat invariably gets sick of waiting, hangs up and goes off to do whatever it is that terrorists do when they aren't being mean-spirited.

Te Radar's column is here. His website is here.

There are people who probably think you shouldn't joke about these things. Comedian George Carlin always maintained you can joke about anything. Anything. It all depends on the exaggeration: "People say rape can't be funny. I say rape can be funny. Picture Elmer Fudd raping Porky Pig. That's funny!" Here's George joking about environmentalism (or at least, a transcript of a portion of George joking about environmentalism -- breaking copyright isn't funny -- if you want the full thing you'll have to buy his album 'Jamming in New York.' Or ask to borrow mine).

You wanna know how the planet's doing? Ask George. ... There is nothing wrong with the planet. Nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine. The PEOPLE are fucked. Difference. Difference. The planet is fine. Compared to the people, the planet is doing great.